Sunday, June 28, 2015

Gloomy Glenn is Back. We’re All Going to Die.

Gloomy Glenn Beck has returned and that means we’re all going to die. The Dark One has come to harvest our souls and Obama the Terrible is going to begin to close his iron fist around the Christians, round them up and kill them. And don’t worry, he’s totally not exaggerating.

Glenn Beck opened his television program last night by declaring that “it’s time to go now” because everything he has been warning about for the last decare is now all coming to fruition.

Beck said that he sat all of his children down on Sunday night and told them that “now is the time, kids, this is the time that I have been preparing you for almost your whole life now, since September 11th. This is the time.”…

Beck continued with his misinformation campaign by then repeating his likewise untrue claim that the University of California has banned phrases such as “America is a melting pot,” before inevitably warning that all of this can only end in death.

“When you get down to banning ideas, the next step is banning books,” Beck warned. “First step. They soften the ground, biblical views can get you fired, expressing the idea of merit is bad. What’s next? I will tell you: book burnings, and re-education, and death. That’s not something I’m predicting, that’s not something I’m projecting, that’s not something I’m cheering for, I’m not using hyperbole, I’m looking solely at history.”

Jesus, imagine having that guy as a dad? His bedtime stories would give you nightmares. “Okay kids, the black helicopters will soon be here and the jackbooted thugs will soon be breaking down our door and dragging us away to the reeducation camps. Sleep tight. Don’t let the bedbugs bite.”

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